JD Vance slouched in the White House, listening to Trump offend other nations, looking like he shoehorned himself into a pair of boots last seen at a 1970s disco funeral.

The man who cobbled together a career out of saying whatever the room required has now, apparently, decided the room also requires him to look like he has micro feet. These aren’t dress shoes, they’re elevator pitches, the kind of lift you get when your entire political identity is standing on someone else’s platform.

You’d think a Senator who already sold his soul wouldn’t need to look any smaller, but here we are: the Vice President of the United States, elevated by every means except merit.