Category Archives: Poetry

Facial Recognition Technology Blues

by Eddie B. and the G-Spots (as noted by Bruce Schneier)

I can’t recognize a face
yes I am just a big disgrace
A failure of security
you think they’d have enough of me
that’s right

Lie-lie-lie-la-la-lie

Gotta find Bin Laden, Osama
instead, I stop your old grandma
Though I came close, when I did stop
those bearded guys from ZZ Top
last night

Lie-lie-lie-la-la-lie

Failing, yes I keep failing
No, I ain’t nailing
one single face

Failing, yes I keep failing
Though they keep hailing
me as a saving grace

Put on mustache glasses for a lark
and I’ll think that you’re Groucho Marx
Thought Kathie Lee was Busta-Rhymes
and I spotted Elvis fifty times

Lie-lie-lie-la-la-lie

Can’t tell gender, not at all
exploded when I saw RuPaul
Though, even I am at a loss
how I confused Al Roker with Kate Moss

Lie-lie-lie-la-la-lie

Failing, yes I keep failing
No, I ain’t nailing
one single face

Failing, yes I keep failing
Though they keep hailing
me as a saving grace

Meeting at Night

Photo by me

photo

Poem by Robert Browning (1812-1889)

The grey sea and the long black land;
And the yellow half-moon large and low;
And the startled little waves that leap
In fiery ringlets from their sleep,
As I gain the cove with pushing prow,
And quench its speed i’ the slushy sand.

Then a mile of warm sea-scented beach;
Three fields to cross till a farm appears;
A tap at the pane, the quick sharp scratch
And blue spurt of a lighted match,
And a voice less loud, through its joys and fears,
Than the two hearts beating each to each!

Where your bare foot walks

by Rumi (translation by Coleman Barks)

I want to be where
your bare foot walks,

because maybe before you step,
you’ll look at the ground. I want that blessing.

A blessing perhaps if all you want is consideration, but not such a blessing if you still get squished like a bug by someone’s bare foot (someone who has factored the costs, or is oblivious to them). An African proverb has a slightly different take on the same theme:

When elephants fight, it is the grass that suffers.

Do the elephants look at the ground? Would they, if the “bare foot” theory of Rumi were true?

Holy Scriptures of the Flying Spaghetti Monster

by Chuckstar

FSM is my chef; I shall not starve.
He maketh me rigatoni with sweet sauces:
He leadeth me inside the kitchen.
He restoreth good taste:
He leadeth me to the pasta strainer for al dente’s sake.

Yea, though I walk through the foodcourt lacking pasta,
I shall fear no burgers: for thou art with me;
Thy noodley appendages, they comfort me.
Thou preparest a table before me with marinara and alfredo;
Thou annointest my spaghetti with meatballs; My plate runneth over.

Surely cappucino and dessert shall follow pasta all the meals of my life,
and I will eat in the Olive Garden forever.

Food for thought…