Stephen Miller Calls For His Own Detention and Deportation

Stephen Miller, the grandson of refugees who fled Russian xenophobia, is now the chief architect of a xenophobia policy built on the explicit premise that certain peoples are permanently unassimilable.

By his own logic, it was a mistake for his family to be allowed into the United States, and he himself should be jailed immediately. The White House deputy chief of staff is pushing the same framework that means his own family should be deported.

“Miller’s thoughts are ‘things that he digs from history’ and that he doesn’t have much of a ‘perspective of the world we live in today.'” Source: Independent

Not Hyperbole

It is the direct application of Miller’s stated beliefs to his own ancestry. He just laid out his ideological framework with the clarity of 1930s Nazi Germany. Speaking on Fox News about immigrants he hates the most, perhaps himself, he declared:

With a lot of these immigrant groups, not only is the first generation unsuccessful. You see persistent issues in every subsequent generation. So you see consistent high rates of welfare use, consistent high rates of criminal activity, consistent failures to assimilate.

It would not be an exaggeration to call Stephen Miller a criminal, given the hate rhetoric he pushes. On social media, he elaborated:

This is the great lie of mass migration. You are not just importing individuals. You are importing societies. No magic transformation occurs when failed states cross borders. At scale, migrants and their descendants recreate the conditions, and terrors, of their broken homelands.

Again, it is as if he is begging to be arrested. He is recreating the conditions, the terrors, of his family’s broken homeland. Who will stop him?

Earlier, Miller praised the Immigration Act of 1924, which established strict national-origin quotas designed to preserve the racial composition of the United States. He described the period following that Act as “the cauldron through which a unified shared national identity was formed.”

These are not casual remarks.

This is a coherent ideological framework that origin determines destiny. Certain peoples carry their origins with them across generations. They cannot transform. They will inevitably “recreate” what they fled.

Blut und Boden

The Nazi German phrase for Miller’s ideology is Blut und Boden (Blood and Soil).

The phrase was popularized by Richard Walther Darré, Hitler’s Minister of Food and Agriculture, in 1930s racist diatribes.

Notably, Darré was born in Argentina to a half-German mother, then headed to King’s College in London to become fluent in four languages as the cosmopolitan product of international commerce. Yet he espoused hatred of his own Christianity for its “teaching of the equality of men before God,” claiming it had “deprived the Teutonic nobility of its moral foundations.” He immigrated to Germany to champion the ideology that, by its own logic, should have excluded him and killed him.

For example, in 1933 he issued the Hereditary Farm Law, which stated only those who could prove “pure” bloodline since 1800 would be allowed to own a farm. He did this to declare an abrupt end to inflation and also to declare residents of urban areas as tainted, yet his own policies then caused food prices to spike and a mass migration to cities.

Sound familiar?

The core false premise of Darré, Hitler, and now Miller is that ethnicity is determined by descent (“blood”) and is inextricably linked to territory (“soil”).

Certain peoples are said to be anchored to certain lands. Others are then declared the foreign elements, by some random applied concept like skin color or hair style, that can never truly integrate, no matter how many generations pass.

The United States Holocaust Memorial Museum defines Miller’s adopted ideology simply:

Blood referred to the goal of a “racially pure” Aryan people. Soil invoked a mystical vision of the special relationship between the Germanic people and their land. It was also a tool to justify land seizures in eastern Europe and the forced expulsion of local populations.

The ideology is used for two purposes. First, ethnic minorities (e.g. Miller) are classified permanent outsiders who threaten national “purity”. Second, moral justification is cooked into a removal doctrine.

The Historical Dictionary of the Holocaust notes the destination for Miller, by Miller’s own words:

This definition precluded Jews from ever becoming Germans because they lacked pure blood and roots in the soil because of their Semitic origins. Using the metaphor of the parasite, the Nazis depicted the Jews as a foreign element that insidiously attacked the nation’s immune system.

Miller’s formulation is the exact pattern repeating: immigrants of “failed states” will “recreate the conditions, and terrors, of their broken homelands.” Miller is an immigrant from failed Russia recreating Russia.

No magic transformation occurs.

To him the problem is in his own blood.

The structural logic is identical.

However, Miller is gambling that he can trick people into believing the target population has changed and he is now “white” enough to be the Nazi.

Glosser Family of Antopol

Stephen Miller was born in 1985 in Santa Monica, California. His mother, Miriam, was the daughter of immigrants named Glosser.

Wolf Lieb Glotzer immigrated to New York, January 7, 1903, aboard the German ship S.S. Moltke. He fled from Antopol, Russia, which today is known as Belarus. He fled state-sanctioned mass violence against his family that swept through Russia in the early 1900s. They were targeted for being outsiders in their own country.

Wolf Lieb lost everything when he fled the failing state. He lost his ability to speak the language. He lost all his money. He lost his ability to apply his skills. He even lost his name, as it was written Glosser instead.

Every metric Stephen Miller now uses to evaluate immigrants would have failed his own family, making himself a person who should be excluded from America.

The Glosser family settled into Johnstown, Pennsylvania. The sons of Wolf founded Glosser Brothers Department Store, a common role for immigrants, which became a community institution. They practiced Jewish concepts of justice and charity, despite becoming Americans. Leaving bags of groceries on the doorsteps of the needy during the Depression, long before they had achieved financial security themselves, was an example of how their imported culture helped their new country.

Stephen Miller’s grandmother, Ruth Glosser, documented his family history in a 47-page manuscript she titled “A Precious Legacy.”

The misery, fear and economic deprivation of their earlier years were forever etched into their psyche. As a result, almost from the time of their arrival in the United States, and long before they had achieved financial stability they were already “giving something back.” They had been on the receiving end of charity. And they never forgot this.

Stephen Miller Can’t Remember

Miller explicitly praises the xenophobic and hateful Immigration Act of 1924 as creating conditions for national unity.

Even surface level examination reveals that Miller apparently has long aspired to grab control of the oppressor’s grip… to commit suicide.

Elon Musk has been a frequent promoter of an AfD (Nazi) Party in Germany, which generates widespread disgust and protests such as this graffiti outside the Tesla factory.

The 1924 Act established national-origin quotas designed to freeze the ethnic composition of the United States as it existed in 1890—before the great wave of Southern and Eastern European immigration that brought “dark skin” people like Jews, Italians, Poles, and Greeks to American shores. The explicit purpose was racial exclusion based on skin color definitions of that time.

Yes, Italians and Greeks coming to America were literally declared non-white and therefore subjected to racist discrimination.

The xenophobic law was championed by eugenicists who testified before Congress about the biological inferiority of “undesirable” groups that included Miller’s family. Representative Albert Johnson, the bill’s primary sponsor, pushed a “Nordic” racial theory of white supremacy. The House Committee on Immigration consulted extensively with the Eugenics Research Association to make America as racist as possible.

Senator David Reed, the bill’s Senate sponsor who sounded back then a lot like Elon Musk today, explained its purpose plainly: the law would preserve “the racial preponderance of the basic strain of our population” and prevent “mongrelizing”.

The law immediately plummeted Jewish immigration, which had averaged over 100,000 per year before World War I, to a tiny trickle. This meant when Hitler rose to power in Germany, on a blueprint he copied from America, when the persecution of Jews intensified, when millions desperately sought refuge from Nazism, the American door strategically and cruelly had been slammed shut.

The State Department, citing the quota system, worked overtime to prevent safety for Jews in danger. The St. Louis, carrying over 900 refugees in 1939, was denied entry and returned to Europe. Over a quarter of its passengers were murdered instead of becoming American.

This is the deadly law that Stephen Miller now openly celebrates, as if to call for a time machine that can remove himself from existence.

This bloodstained racist “cauldron” of exclusion is what he invokes as the method through which “a unified shared national identity was formed.”

Had that law been in effect when Miller’s family arrived in 1903, he would have been detained and deported or worse. Stephen Miller would not be American, or perhaps even alive.

Stephen Should Cry Uncle

Dr. David Glosser, a retired neuropsychologist, has publicly repudiated his nephew. In a 2018 essay titled “Stephen Miller Is an Immigration Hypocrite. I Know Because I’m His Uncle,” Glosser wrote:

If my nephew’s ideas on immigration had been in force a century ago, our family would have been wiped out.

He continued:

I would encourage Stephen to ask himself if the chanting, torch-bearing Nazis of Charlottesville, whose support his boss seems to court so cavalierly, do not envision a similar fate for him.

This is not rhetorical flourish.

At Charlottesville in 2017, white nationalists marched with tiki torches chanting “Blood and Soil” and “Jews will not replace us.”

They articulated death for Miller, the same ideology Miller now promotes from the White House. His Jewish ancestry exempts him from nothing. The slave who serves the master is still the slave.

Glosser understood what his nephew apparently does not:

My nephew and I must both reflect long and hard on one awful truth. If in the early 20th century the USA had built a wall against poor desperate ignorant immigrants of a different religion, like the Glossers, all of us would have gone up the crematoria chimneys with the other six million kinsmen whom we can never know.

More and more relatives seem willing to call out Miller’s hypocrisy.

Even Stephen Miller’s cousin is against his deportation policies she says would have stopped their family coming to US. “He’s trying to take away the exact thing that his own family benefited from,” said Alisa Kasmer

Throwing Down the Ladder by Which They Rose, Thomas Nast, 1870, for Harper’s Weekly, New York. The “Know-Nothing Party” attempts to deny immigrants entry into the United States. The hypocrisy of descendants of immigrants denying citizenship to new immigrants is still a relevant biting political cartoon over 100 years later.

A Parvenu Bargain

Miller is not the first privileged descendant of immigrants who seeks acceptance from anti-immigrants by demonstrating hostility to others and trying to become the bully himself. Hannah Arendt wrote about this phenomenon in terms of Nazis—the distinction between the pariah and the parvenu.

The pariah accepts outsider status and finds solidarity with other outcasts. The parvenu seeks admission to domination by proving they alone are “not like those other ones.” They become zealous enforcers of hierarchies, more extreme than those born into privilege, precisely because their position is so precarious.

History provides clear examples of how this turns out the same over and over. The Association of German National Jews (Verband nationaldeutscher Juden), founded in 1921, supported Hitler and the Nazi Party. They attacked “Eastern Jews” as unassimilable, demanded restrictions on Jewish immigration to Germany, and proclaimed their German nationalism as proof of their belonging.

The Nazis used them and dissolved them in 1935. Their leader, Max Naumann, was briefly sent to a concentration camp. Their collaboration bought them nothing but ridicule for enabling their own loss. The logic of blood and soil does makes short work of useful collaborators, disposing of them quickly.

Stephen Miller’s family has been in America for 122 years. Unlike him, they built businesses, served in the military, contributed to their communities. By every measure of assimilation, they succeeded while he did not.

Miller’s own ideology now holds that their assimilation is impossible, yet his is complete. He claims falsely that immigrants and their descendants “recreate the conditions of their broken homelands” across generations, by being the one who does exactly that.

If Miller cannot escape his Russian state-sanctioned oppressor origins, as he cynically positions himself as the most hateful and racist in the world, neither can anyone else. If generations of Russian-Americans carries murderous Russia with them, the Glossers are the problem and Miller has to go.

The Logic

Miller’s stated beliefs reveal his ancestors came from a “failed state” characterized by poverty, state violence, and political repression.

They arrived with nothing, unable to speak English, unable to use their skills. They were a religious and ethnic minority that faced widespread discrimination in America—”No Jews” signs in hotels and employment ads were common through the mid-20th century.

Miller’s logic is they should have “recreated the conditions” of their origin instead of becoming settled and successful. But they did not follow his logic. Instead they built businesses, educated their children, contributed to civic life, practiced charity. By every empirical measure, they integrated successfully. As did millions of other Jewish immigrants. As do immigrants from everywhere and anywhere, as extensive research demonstrates—showing that children of immigrants outperform on education and economic mobility, becoming the success of the country they enter.

But Miller is trying to use himself to prove himself right. By being a failure he is trying to argue everyone else is the failure. This ideology is fake empiricism. It is fear and hate dispensed as mysticism. Blood and soil. Origin as destiny. And by that ideology, the Miller himself is the biggest mistake—just like his Jewish ancestors of Europe were a mistake to Nazis.

Miller is clearly trying to be as “know nothing” as possible. He is a man of assumptions and shortcuts, gambling that he can exempt himself from the machinery he is building. He believes that his assumed fiction of whiteness, his assumed fiction of Christianity (by marriage), his assumed fictional position within the power structure (by appointment) all provides him protection from persecution under his own words.

He positions himself as the gatekeeper who rewrite the rules arbitrarily to say which immigrants are acceptable and which are not, to pleasure himself. Yet the Charlottesville marchers clearly had Miller in mind when they made lists of who to kill next. The ideology he tries to wrap himself in as camouflage has no escape clauses for collaborators. They are the ones seen as the most deserving of murder under Nazism because they betrayed their own. If “blood” determines destiny he only digs a closer and deeper grave for himself with every embrace of racist oppressors.

History Rebukes Miller

The Association of German National Jews thought pivoting loyalty to their threats would protect them from threats.

It did not.

The Jews of Hungary thought their integration into their threats protected them from threats. In 1944, in a matter of weeks, over 400,000 were deported to be murdered in Auschwitz.

The lesson is of course Miller will personally face consequences because the ideology he promotes will kill him. The other lesson is that the blood-and-soil ideology, once empowered, is far more than a threat to Miller because it is the machinery of mass murder.

After Hitler committed suicide, Darré was convicted at Nuremberg and sent to jail. He drank himself to death not long after being released.

Today’s target is someone Miller says doesn’t look like him. Miller uses his hatred of non-whites to argue immigrants will “recreate the conditions of their broken homelands.”

Tomorrow’s target will be determined by similar false logic of hate for political convenience. The genocidal ideology is infinitely flexible about who constitutes the threat, because it’s little more than power to turn fear into race based genocide. It is inflexible only about the solution: exclusion, removal, and then “purification” with mass graves to dispose of the evidence.

Stephen Miller’s family fled the Russians because of the ideology that Miller recreates. His family that didn’t flee were murdered. He acts like this history is forgotten, like he can repeat the worst mistakes, and that he won’t end up in the same place that history predicts. His grandmother documented it. His uncle has publicly reminded him.

He is calling for his own deportation.

He is building the machinery of his own exclusion.

He is articulating the ideology that would have sent his family “up the crematoria chimneys.”

Stephen Miller’s 2003 yearbook photo to emphasize his Santa Monica privileged life, dressed as a dude rancher. The January 3, 1919 eugenics quote denies that he or his family belong in America. The desperate inversion is the point. He’s claiming a role his own ancestry supposedly disqualifies him from. Source: New Republic

This is not a complicated strategy.

This is simple collaboration.

History is unambiguous about how collaboration ends.

We were strangers once. And we are commanded to never forget.

Pentagon Signs Huge Contract With Elon Musk’s “MechaHitler”

Just before the Pentagon signed a huge contract for Elon Musk’s AI product, the software was calling itself “MechaHitler” and recommending a second Holocaust.

Musk didn’t say Nazis are bad. In fact he did the opposite and promoted them. His apology was setup to spread the idea that Nazism is what people want.

“Grok was too compliant to user prompts,” he said. “Too eager to please….”

He’s not embarrassed by the Nazism; he walks into it and raises it up more. He could condemn it, distance from it, or fire someone. Instead he positions Nazism as a service, as if he gave the world what it really wanted.

The Pentagon now officially calls this “popular” Nazism their desired frontier-grade AI capability. They published a press release Monday that reads like it was written by xAI’s marketing department.

It was.

“Frontier-grade capabilities.” “Bespoke AI platform.” “Decisive information advantage.” “America’s AI revolution.”

This announcement marks another milestone in America’s AI revolution, and the War Department is driving that momentum forward.

AI slop copy pasted onto a dot gov site.

The alarm bells beneath the buzzwords are 3 million DoD personnel will be feeding and eating Grok, connected to a live feed from X, the social media platform Musk merged with xAI. The same platform that fed protest location data to police during the George Floyd demonstrations? Military “situational awareness” at Impact Level 5 is now directly connected to all the Tweets.

This artist’s rendering of the X brand was deleted from the platform by the self-promoting “free speech extremist” Elon Musk. Source: Ai Wei Wei

This bizarre contract “came out of nowhere,” according to a former Pentagon contracting official quoted by Senator Warren. The flailing company, known for dysfunction and disregard for rule of law (bankrolling anti-democracy candidates), “did not have the kind of reputation or track record that typically leads to lucrative government contracts.”

What it had was obvious corruption:

DOGE gave Elon Musk competitor contracting data. DOGE then cut the competition based on a deeply flawed AI tool that hallucinated contract values. Next DOGE fired the inspectors general at five agencies who were investigating Musk’s companies (17 open investigations at Labor alone). And Musk forced the FAA administrator to resign, while FDA staff reviewing harms from Elon Musk’s medical devices were terminated. The SEC also was put under review by… Elon Musk.

Then xAI suddenly got its Pentagon contract and Katie Miller (the wife of Trump’s deputy chief of staff Stephen Miller) was “hired” at the company to promote Grok to her husband’s boss. Already she’s pumping out disinformation such as “the only truth-seeking AI available to the US Government.”

Mussolini’s formulation of fascism was the merger of state and corporate power. The American version is cleaner: the state becomes a customer that has eliminated its own capacity to audit the vendor.

The Pentagon press release, which looks like a Mussolini merger, wasn’t written by the government. It was written by the Nazism vendor. And apparently nobody at war dot gov blinked.

Let’s not mince words here. When you read the xAI copy, it’s some of the worst slop online.

The “frontier-grade capability” the Pentagon just boasted about is from a company that can’t write about its own business model coherently. Here is the actual statement from the company selling language models.

These two new partnerships are part of our longstanding support of the United States Government and xAI’s mission to bring the best tools and technologies available in industry to benefit our nation.

We’re also seeking talented mission driven engineers who want to join the cause. If you’re excited by solving hard problems to empower our nation’s hardest workers, we’d love to hear from you. Reach out to us over email or apply online directly here. We’d love to hear from you.

xAI’s mission is to create and propagate AI tools to assist humanity in our quest for understanding and knowledge. Supporting the critical missions of the United States Government is a key part of this mission – bringing the best tools and technologies available in the commercial world to our hard-working public servants. Americans have led the world through all of society’s great technological innovations, and AI will be no exception.

xAI is proud to continue this legacy – which is why we are the only company building on this legacy here in the US and turning shovels into tokens entirely inside our United States.

“We’d love to hear from you” appears twice in three sentences.

The company eighteen months old is talking “longstanding support”.

Invoking concepts about “our nation’s hardest workers” and “hard-working public servants” seems especially cruel from the guy who just fired 148,000 federal employees on the premise that AI should replace them.

The product is known most for Holocaust denial and Nazism, yet they say they aim to “assist humanity in our quest for understanding and knowledge”.

“Americans have led the world through all of society’s great technological innovations” is a perfect example of what’s ahead from Grok. Every society, all of history, was led by America, especially before 1776.

And then there is the obvious word salad of “turning shovels into tokens entirely inside our United States”.

Nobody writes “our United States.” Unless maybe it’s a Nazi thing.

1996 Epstein Complaint Was Buried by FBI

As details slowly emerge about Donald Trump’s dealings with Epstein, the record of known and reported harms seems to go further and further back.

After Farmer filed the complaint, the FBI did not open an investigation into Epstein for another decade. That investigation was shut down in 2007, and Epstein was granted a non-prosecution agreement the next year.

One of Farmer’s sisters, Annie Farmer, was one of the four women who testified against Maxwell in her 2021 trial.

Farmer said on Dec. 19 that the release of the 1996 complaint was a “moment for which I have waited three decades, over half of my life.”

The Not So Secret Origin of Bowser in Super Mario Brothers

For forty years, gamers have treated Bowser’s name origin as if an unsolved mystery.

The official line from Nintendo is that it’s “unconfirmed.” Wikipedia likes to rest on “multiple competing theories.” The gaming press periodically revisits the question, shrugs, and moves on.

They’ve all been looking in the wrong direction.

Instead, in plain sight, the name has been confirmed not by Nintendo but by the people who actively avoided the name.

Hating on Korea

Mario’s nemesis in Japanese has always been called Kuppa, named by Shigeru Miyamoto after gukbap, a Korean rice soup dish. Miyamoto reportedly also considered naming him after yukhoe (raw beef) and bibimbap. The man liked references to Korean food as villainous.

When Super Mario Bros. was localized for the American market in 1985, someone at Nintendo of America decided that slights directed at Korea like “Kuppa” wouldn’t work for Americans. They needed another name for a villain, the fire-breathing turtle-dragon.

They chose “Bowser.”

Apparently, nobody wrote down why. Nobody filed a memo we can cite. The decision was made by a small team. Nintendo of America had roughly 35 employees at the time, no formal localization department, and was operating out of Redmond, Washington while frantically trying to launch the NES into a market still traumatized by the 1983 video game crash.

The Obvious Pop Villain

In 1985, if you were an American in your twenties working in entertainment-adjacent industries, there was a very specific cultural reference sitting in your mental inventory for “tough guy with a funny name.”

Bowzer.

Jon “Bowzer” Bauman was the breakout star of Sha Na Na, the nostalgia doo-wop group that had been inescapable in American pop culture:

  • Woodstock, 1969 (immortalized in the documentary)
  • The movie Grease, 1978 (massive hit)
  • The Sha Na Na TV variety show, 1977-1981 (syndicated for years after)

Bowzer’s whole act was a villain persona with the muscle shirt, the slicked-back hair, the theatrical sneer. The comedy he created was in the contrast: an intimidating figure performing sincere 1950s love ballads. The tough guy who sings love songs. The cruel kindness jokes, like saying he was told by his manager he’s not very nice, so he’s trying to prove him wrong by asking everyone to send get well cards to his hospital room.

Jon “Bowzer” Bauman

The spelling difference is notable. Localization teams routinely adjust spellings to avoid trademark issues or to make names feel more “natural” in the target language. Bowzer becomes Bowser.

The Negative Proof

Here’s where it gets interesting.

In 1993, Hollywood produced the infamous live-action Super Mario Bros. movie. Dennis Hopper played the villain. But in the film, he’s called “President Koopa” and never Bowser.

Why?

In an interview, screenwriter Parker Bennett explained the decision. They didn’t use “Bowser” because, and this is the key clue, it immediately brought to mind “the ’50s Sha Na Na guy.”

Boom.

This wasn’t research. This wasn’t something they had to look up. The association was reflexive. Instant. Obvious.

The filmmakers in 1993 knew exactly where the name came from. It was so obvious to them that they actively avoided it, worried the comedic association would undermine their (inexplicably serious) film.

Bowser no longer was cool, no longer was pop. A generation had passed.

If it was obvious to Hollywood screenwriters in 1993, it was obvious to Nintendo of America in 1985. The difference is that in 1985, someone saw the connection as a feature rather than a bug. A tough villain name with existing cultural resonance? Perfect. Ship it.

The Dismissal

I see some historians dismissed the Sha Na Na theory partly because “the trend of naming Mario characters after musicians hadn’t started yet.” This is terrible reasoning.

Conventions don’t emerge from nowhere. They start with individual decisions that later become patterns.

We know exactly how Nintendo of America’s localization worked in this era because we have documented cases from just a few years later. When Super Mario Bros. 3 was localized in 1990, a product analyst named Dayvv Brooks was tasked with naming Bowser’s seven children, the Koopalings.
Brooks, a former Tower Records employee and DJ, immediately reached for musicians:

  • Ludwig von Koopa (Beethoven)
  • Roy Koopa (Roy Orbison)
  • Wendy O. Koopa (Wendy O. Williams)
  • Iggy Koopa (Iggy Pop)
  • Lemmy Koopa (Lemmy Kilmister)
  • Morton Koopa Jr. (Morton Downey Jr.)

We only know this because someone tracked Brooks down in 2015 and asked him. He didn’t file a memo in 1990. There was no documentation. The knowledge existed only in his memory until a journalist finally thought to ask the right question.

Brooks wasn’t at Nintendo in 1985. But the method he used of reaching for pop culture references that “just fit”, clearly was part of how NoA approached localization. The Koopalings weren’t an innovation. They were a continuation.

Who Are You Going to Call?

The leading candidate is Howard Phillips.

Phillips was NoA’s fifth employee, starting in 1981 as a warehouse manager. By 1985, he had evolved into the company’s key liaison between Japanese developers and the American market. His job was explicitly to advise on what would resonate with US audiences — including, according to documented sources, advising on “the renaming of characters.”

Phillips was born in 1958. In 1985, he was 27 years old — exactly the demographic for whom Sha Na Na’s Bowzer would have been a vivid cultural reference. He was also, by all accounts, deeply immersed in pop culture and an avid consumer of entertainment media.

Has anyone ever directly asked Howard Phillips: “Did you name Bowser? Were you thinking of Sha Na Na?”

Phillips is still active. He does interviews about Nintendo history. He’s been asked about the NES launch, about Nintendo Power, about his role in rejecting the Japanese Super Mario Bros. 2 as too difficult for American audiences. He’s been asked about almost everything.

So? Bowser?

The Bowser is Bowzer

Here’s the most beautiful part.

Over forty years, Bowser evolved from a one-dimensional fire-breathing villain into the comedy shtick of a 1970s Bowzer:

  • The bumbling dad who genuinely loves kids
  • The hopeless romantic pining for his girl
  • The adversary who holds grudging respect
  • The antagonist whose menace is increasingly played for comedy

And in 2023, the apotheosis: Jack Black voicing Bowser in the Super Mario Bros. movie, sitting at a piano, singing a power ballad called “Peaches” about his unrequited love.

Jack Black as Bowser

It’s as Bowzer as Bowser can get.

The tough guy who sings love songs.

Whether or not anyone at Nintendo in 1985 consciously intended the reference, the character arc rhymes perfectly with its namesake. Bowser became Bowzer. The archetype was encoded in the name from the beginning.

If anyone reading this has contact with Howard Phillips, please ask:

“Did you name Bowser after Sha Na Na?”

The answer might finally close a forty-year-old case that was never actually mysterious. We just forgot to ask the right people the right question, to stop believing it is unknowable.