Security

A good year!

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Sent to me this morning…

Afgani
– Saale Nao Mubbarak
Afrikaans
– Gelukkige nuwe jaar
Albanian
– Gezuar Vitin e Ri
Armenian
– Snorhavor Nor Tari
Arabic
– Antum salimoun
Assyrian
– Sheta Brikhta
Azeri
– Yeni Iliniz Mubarek!
Bengali
– Shuvo Nabo Barsho
Bulgarian
– Chestita Nova Godina
Cambodian
– Soursdey Chhnam Tmei
Cantonese (Hong Kong)
– Sun Leen Fai Lok
Catalan
– FELIÇ ANY NOU
Chinese
– Xin Nian Kuai Le
Corsican Language
– Pace e Salute
Croatian
– Sretna Nova godina!
Cymraeg (Welsh)
– Blwyddyn Newydd Dda
Czech
– Scastny Novy Rok
Danish
РGodt Nyt̴r
Dhivehi
– Ufaaveri Aa Aharakah Edhen
Dutch
– GELUKKIG NIEUWJAAR!
Eskimo (Inuktitut)
– Ukiortame pivdluaritlo
Esperanto
– Felican Novan Jaron
Estonians
– Head uut aastat!
Ethiopian
– MELKAM ADDIS AMET YIHUNELIWO!
Finnish
– Onnellista Uutta Vuotta
French
– Bonne Annee
Gaelic
– Bliadhna mhath ur
Galician [northwestern Spain]
– Bo Nadal e Feliz Aninovo
German
– Prosit Neujahr
Greek
– Kenourios Chronos
Gujarati
– Nutan Varshbhinandan
Hawaiian
– Hauoli Makahiki Hou
Hebrew
– L’Shannah Tovah
Hindi
– Naye Varsha Ki Shubhkamanyen
Hong Kong (Cantonese)
– Sun Leen Fai Lok
Hungarian
– Boldog Ooy Ayvet
Indonesian
– Selamat Tahun Baru
Iranian
– Saleh now mobarak
Iraqi
– Sanah Jadidah
Irish
– Bliain nua fe mhaise dhuit
Italian
– Felice anno nuovo
Japanese
– Akimashite Omedetto Gozaimasu
Kabyle
– Asegwas Amegaz
Kannada
– Hosa Varushadha Shubhashayagalu
Kisii
– SOMWAKA OMOYIA OMUYA
Khmer
– Sua Sdei tfnam tmei
Korean
– Saehae Bock Mani ba deu sei yo!
Kurdish
– NEWROZ PIROZBE
Lithuanian
– Laimingu Naujuju Metu
Laotian
– Sabai dee pee mai
Macedonian
– Srekjna Nova Godina
Malay
– Selamat Tahun Baru
Marathi
– Nveen Varshachy Shubhechcha
Malayalam
– Puthuvatsara Aashamsakal
Maltese
– Is-Sena t- Tajba
Nepal
– Nawa Barsha ko Shuvakamana
Norwegian
РGodt Nytt̴r
Papua New Guinea
– Nupela yia i go long yu
Pampango (Philippines)
– Masaganang Bayung Banua
Pashto
– Nawai Kall Mo Mubarak Shah
Persian
– Saleh now ra tabrik migouyam
Philippines
– Manigong Bagong Taon
Polish
– Szczesliwego Nowego Roku
Portuguese
– Feliz Ano Novo
Punjabi
– Nave sal di mubarak
Romanian
– AN NOU FERICIT
Russian
– S Novim Godom
Samoa
– Manuia le Tausaga Fou
Serbian
– Srećna nova godina (Срећна Ð?ова Година)
Sindhi
– Nayou Saal Mubbarak Hoje
Singhalese
– Subha Aluth Awrudhak Vewa
Siraiki
– Nawan Saal Shala Mubarak Theevay
Slovak
– A stastlivy Novy Rok
Slovenian
РSre̬no novo leto
Somali
– Iyo Sanad Cusub Oo Fiican!
Spanish
– Feliz Ano ~Nuevo
Swahili
– Heri Za Mwaka Mpyaº
Swedish
– GOTT NYTT Ã…R! /Gott nytt Ã¥r!
Sudanese
– Warsa Enggal
Tamil
– Eniya Puthandu Nalvazhthukkal
Telegu
– Noothana samvatsara shubhakankshalu
Thai
– Sawadee Pee Mai
Turkish
– Yeni Yiliniz Kutlu Olsun
Ukrainian
– Shchastlyvoho Novoho Roku
Urdu
– Naya Saal Mubbarak Ho
Uzbek
– Yangi Yil Bilan
Vietnamese
– Chuc Mung Tan Nien
Welsh (Cymraeg)
– Blwyddyn Newydd Dda!
Yiddish
– Ah goot yohr

Am I missing any? Now, if everyone could just agree on the same day and time for the new year, let alone the relative meaning of time, to go along with the universal way of speaking… :)

I used to live very close to the Greenwich observatory and would occasionally go and watch the original orange ball drop. The one thing that really stood out to me there, aside from the relationship between speed/distance of travel and timekeeping, is that things seem far less festive when they happen every day. I never met anyone there who was anxiously waiting to genuinely celebrate the change to 1pm. Maybe that’s just because we aren’t moving fast enough yet for the relativity to be significant enough…

From another perspective,”Globish” appears to be an attempt to move from isolated and relative languages to something more mean.

I say tomato … you say red, round fruit. Increasingly, people across the world use some sort of English, but it is not the Queen’s. Robert McCrum, Observer Literary Editor, reports on why Globish – English-lite – is becoming the universal language of boardroom, the net and politics

So, in that spirit, I think saying “A good year” is a fine way to bring in 2007.

Food, Security

Kansas Outlaws Evolution, “No Species Exempt”

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The Onion with breaking news in this report:

The sweeping new law prohibits all living beings within state borders from being born with random genetic mutations that could make them better suited to evade predators, secure a mate, or, adapt to a changing environment. In addition, it bars any sexual reproduction, battles for survival, or instances of pure happenstance that might lead, after several generations, to a more well-adapted species or subspecies.

Comprehensive approach. They’ve certainly done their homework.

To enforce the law, Kansas state police will be trained to investigate and apprehend organisms who exhibit suspected signs of evolutionary behavior, such as natural selection or speciation. Plans are underway to track and monitor DNA strands in every Kansan life form for even the slightest change in allele frequencies.

Your cell-phone may soon include DNA analysis capabilities. And surely things like used chewing gum will be treated as essential personal identity information.

Anti-evolutionists such as Hellenbaum have long accused microorganisms of popularizing “an otherwise obscure, agonizingly slow, and hard-to-understand” biological process. “These repeat offenders are at the root of the problem,” Hellenbaum said. “We have the fossil records to prove it.”

Oh, nice dig Onion!

“No species is exempt,” said Marcus Holloway, a state police spokesman. “Whether you’re a human being or a fruit fly—if we detect one homologous chromosome trying to cross over during the process of meiosis, you will be punished to the full extent of the law.”

Although the full impact of the new law will likely not be felt for approximately 10 million years, most Kansans say they are relieved that the ban went into effect this week, claiming that evolution may have gone too far already.

Hilarious stuff. When you read the whole article, note the sage point (pun not intended) about protests from Agribusiness leaders who depend on evolutionary science for genetic modification of crops.

Security

Cheat to win

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This past summer I mentioned a bracelet called “Live Wrong” that parodied Lance Armstrong’s “Live Strong”. I just noticed The Onion has revisited this idea, with another funny version called the Floyd Landis “Cheat to Win” bracelet. In true Onion style, you can buy your own on their online store for just $2.99…also, in related Onion news:

TAMPA PALMS, FL — Avid sports-memorabilia collector Michael Bowen was arrested Tuesday after attempting to raise the value of his Wade Boggs rookie card by killing Wade Boggs.

And if that doesn’t have you shedding a tear, this story might:

Thousands More Dead In Continuing Iraq Victory […] “Victory deaths are at a higher level than we had anticipated, yes,” Gen. George Casey, Jr. said at a press conference shortly after the figures were released. “But one of the crucial lessons of our Vietnam experience is that a victory, in order to remain victorious, can’t be abandoned halfway through, or in the case of Iraq, one-eighth of the way through.” […] President Bush has consistently warned that if we hand over victory to local forces right away, there’s a risk that victory may worsen, as Iraqis won’t be able to contend with the guerrilla attacks and improvised explosive devices that claim the lives of dozens of the victorious every day.

History, Poetry, Security

Epitaph to Boatswain

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by George Gordon Byron, 6th Baron Byron (1788 – 1824)

Near this spot
Are deposited the Remains
Of one
Who possessed Beauty
Without Vanity,
Strength without Insolence,
Courage without Ferocity,
And all the Virtues of Man
Without his Vices.

The Price, which would be unmeaning flattery
If inscribed over Human Ashes,
Is but a just tribute to the Memory of
“Boatswain,� a Dog
Who was born at Newfoundland,
May, 1803,
And died in Newstead Abbey,
Nov. 18, 1808.

When some proud son of man returns to earth,
Unknown by glory, but upheld by birth,
The sculptor’s art exhausts the pomp of woe,
And stories urns record that rests below.
When all is done, upon the tomb is seen,
Not what he was, but what he should have been.
But the poor dog, in life the firmest friend,
The first to welcome, foremost to defend,
Whose honest heart is still his master’s own,
Who labors, fights, lives, breathes for him alone,
Unhonored falls, unnoticed all his worth,
Denied in heaven the soul he held on earth –
While man, vain insect! hopes to be forgiven,
And claims himself a sole exclusive heaven.

Oh man! thou feeble tenant of an hour,
Debased by slavery, or corrupt by power –
Who knows thee well must quit thee with disgust,
Degraded mass of animated dust!
Thy love is lust, thy friendship all a cheat,
Thy smiles hypocrisy, thy words deceit!
By nature vile, ennoble but by name,
Each kindred brute might bid thee blush for shame.
Ye, who perchance behold this simple urn,
Pass on – it honors none you wish to mourn.
To mark a friend’s remains these stones arise;
I never knew but one – and here he lies.

Byron was accused of all kinds of disloyalty and subversive acts (e.g. his adoption of a pet bear when he was told as a student at Trinity that pet dogs were not allowed), but he clearly found solace and perhaps even a more essential and honest companionship with his animals. Perhaps it was because they were less likely to counter his words with their own.